The prospect of starting a family is really exciting for me, and definitely something that I want in the near future. But I have to tell ya, the economical situation of the United States is freakin me out man! Ogg and I are VERY fortunate. We have no debt to speak of (ex. car payments, mortgage, credit card, student loans) and are unbelievably aware of how lucky this is during this time of turmoil and uncertainty for a lot of people; even for some close to us.
We want to buy a house. We want to have a baby. We want to live comfortably and not worry about money.
In other times, these things would be possible, but right now, we're genuinely worried about starting a family when the economy is so unstable. Neither of us want to be in the precarious position of having an infant with only one income and the possibility of the loss of that income at any time.
At my job, I run the collections department. So I am constantly hearing people's excuses of losing their jobs, their homes, etc and why they cannot pay their bills. I see the scariness of this every day and it has gotten to the point where it's affecting my decision to have a family right now!
One side of me thinks, "I'm young, it's not going to be a big deal health-wise if we wait another 3 or 4 years to have kids". The other side thinks, "I'm ready to make this step, why should a little instability worry me? Everyone else is doing it!"
And I can't come to a conclusion. Is this a scary time for anyone else? Would anyone warn me against the financial responsibility of a baby and a home for a while? I just don't know what to think other than the fact that I'm scared!
Monday, June 16, 2008
Stressin' Out!
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6 comments:
tis true, yet I have found through the years that there will never be a "good" time. There will always be bills and other things to pay for. So why wait, but it's not like your running out of time either.
I have a lot to say on this subject, but I think it would offend people so I'll refrain from sharing my opinionated view. You and Ogg just need to do what feels right for you guys! I say pray about it and go from there!
Nobody is ever really ready to have a baby, and if you wait, you might be so comfortable in the situation you are in with no kids, you might come to the point where you aren't willing to give it up. If you do want a family, the prophets have said not to wait. You will be blessed and have joy in your posterity. :) Being a parent is a responsibilty we have on this earth and you will find your life so much more complete, even if you don't have as much money or fancy things. Good luck on your decision!
You're not alone! As if the times we live in aren't scary enough with murders, drugs, etc., now we get to throw in the stress of raising a family without the economical security as well.
However, there's nothing greater than having a family. It makes all the stresses and trials in life worth it!
You'll fine a whole spectrum of opinions on this subject. But when it comes down to it, it's a very individual decision. My one advice is don't let the church culture around you pressure you into starting sooner than you are ready. We waited 3 years and I'm so glad we did ... we just were not ready before that. But it didn't come without people judging us and questioning us all the time about WHEN WHEN WHEN?! So there is no right answer except the one that you and Ogg and the Lord decide :)
Agreed that you should wait until you feel like it's time...but also agreed that financially it will always be a scary move. We are expecting our second and Josh is still applying to grad schools. Needless to say...we don't have all teh money in the world but as someone said it above...children are soooo worth it. With all thoughts of the world aside...whatever is in your heart and Ogg's...if you would like to take this step...it will bring you two so much closer than you already are. It is an amazing experience that will definitely change you for the better! I have to say also...that both children..my 16 month old and this one on the way...were actually surprises....not kidding. We have been in disbelief both times. I was okay with starting a family... but Josh wanted to wait 2 more years. (We waited about 2 years) After all is said and done...he is so in love with our little boy- we both have found a total new joy in our lives and it's wonderful!
Pray about it and don't let worldly concerns get to you. There will always be chaos and horrible things in this world. The good thing about a family is that you are adding something beautiful and wonderful to it!
Sorry if I said too much...I believe you know inside what you two are ready for! One day you'll make amazing parents!
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